#8 Victoria Woodhull
Victoria Woodhull ran for president in 1872, before women could even vote. Woodhull was a spiritualist-turned-New-York-City madam. As a madam, Woodhull learned secrets from wealthy financiers, so she ended up founding the first Wall Street trading firm headed by a woman. Her running mate for the Equal Rights Party was abolitionist Frederick Douglas.
#7 Johnathan Sharkey
Johnathan Sharkey is a former pro wrestler who has run for president repeatedly. Sharkey claims to be a vampire who drinks blood twice a week from women. His platform includes “impaling” people since he claims to be a descendent of Vlad the Impaler. Sharkey is for universal health care, which would be paid for by taxes on drugs and prostitution, which he wants to legalize.
#6 Steve Forbes
Steve Forbes is the son of Forbes Magazine founder Malcolm Forbes. Steve wanted to institute a flat tax, let people opt out of Social Security, fought against health care and for guns. He ran as a Republican twice, in 1996 and 200. Forbes was successful enough to win the Delaware and Arizona primaries in 1996. Although Forbes did not win, his run set the stage for these same ideas to flourish with candidates like Rand Paul.
#5 George Edwin Taylor
George Edwin Taylor ran for president for the National Negro Liberty Party in 1904. Taylor was a journalist and son of slaves who ran on a platform of strict enforcement of the constitution and reparations for ex-slaves. Although he received less than 2,000 votes, he ran to give voice to the black Americans betrayed by Reconstruction.
#4 Vermin Supreme
Vermin Supreme calls himself a “friendly Fascist.” He ran as a Democrat in 2012 and 2016 on a platform that promises to give every American a pony. “It will create lots and lots of jobs once we switch over to a pony based economy.” Vermin also suggests using “the awesome power of zombies for energy sources” by tempting them with brains, which will then convince them to work on wind turbines. Or something.
#3 Joan Jett Blakk
Joan Jett Blakk is a drag queen in Chicago who ran for president in 1992. Her campaign slogan was “Lick Bush in ’92!” She ran again in 1996, with the slogan “Lick Slick Willie in ’96!” Smith ran on the Queer Nation Party ticket. There was some substance in her platform, however, as she campaigned for LGBT issues and universal health care.
#2 Jello Biafra
Indie rocker Jello Biafra is a member of the Dead Kennedys. He first ran for office in 1979 when he tried to get elected mayor of San Francisco, promising to ban all cars. In 2000, he was drafted to challenge Ralph Nader for the nomination of the Green Party. Nader won, but Biafra campaigned for him in 2000 and 2008.
#1 Gabriel Green
Gabriel Green’s run for president is largely forgotten. Green billed himself as a medium who received contact from “Space People.” Green also said he had witnessed hundreds of UFOs. In challenging Richard Nixon and John Kennedy, Green created a detailed platform based on what the Space People had told him. He tried again in 1972.